The beginning of a New Year is a good time to evaluate what we want more of in our life, as well as what we want less of. If we take a close look at our lives we will begin to see patterns of behaviours — in essence habits — that shape us. Some of these habits are helping us achieve our goals, while others may actually be taking us further away from the life we want.

Habits are habituated behaviours which are acquired by frequent repetition — these “habits” then become a regular part of our functioning. These practices can slip into our lives without us even noticing as they feel so natural. It can be very difficult to give up or break a habit. We often hear people talking about wanting to break a bad habit, but we shouldn’t forget that habits aren’t always bad for us.

Recently I had been doing a lot of traveling for work and was craving some time at home with my husband and children. I am a Child and Family Therapist, a professional Parent Educator, and a mother of 17 year-old twins. My children are in Grade 12, have jobs, and recently acquired their driver’s licenses.

I am proud of my children as I believe they are becoming good citizens of this world — this has been one of my primary goals of parenting. I guess one could say that my professional background makes me well qualified for this parenting job, but I must admit that I have had my fair share of humbling moments when it comes to parenting.

Many of us finish the year with indulgences and celebration, and then start the New Year with the best of intentions and sincere resolutions to do things better. Unfortunately these good intentions often end up in frustration and disappointment. Sometimes we find ourselves moving further away from our goals in the New Year rather than accomplishing our resolutions. So how do we take those good intentions and create a plan that will move our vision to reality? How do we avoid the discouragement of failed expectations that lead to avoidance and, even worse, the self-loathing that comes with the failure to achieve the lifestyle changes we want?

One of the gifts of the last Canadian election was the engagement of youth in social issues and the political process. It may have had something to do with Justin Trudeau being younger and appealing to young people — but it may also have had something to do with open discussions around issues that are close to the hearts of our Canadian youth.

As a Child and Family Therapist I have had many opportunities to talk with young people and hear their thoughts and feelings about the world. And as a mother of 17 year old twins I have my own direct conduit to observe what is relevant to young people today.

Just this morning the alarm jolted me out of my pleasant dream. As I groped around in the dark trying to find the button, I was already negotiating with myself to see if it would be possible to hide out in bed for another 10 minutes. I knew this was a dangerous negotiation which could result in me falling back to sleep and being late for work. I decided to ignore the desire to keep my eyes closed and hauled myself out of bed. It struck me that our early morning alarm is in many ways the ultimate reality check.

Most of us have our morning routines that help us transition from the comfort of our beds to the reality of the workplace. I poured my coffee, did my stretches and followed my morning routine until I was not only ready for work, but I was determined to make it a good day at the office. I walked into the office and said a cheery good morning to my co-workers, and another work day had now truly commenced.